Baking in purple and gold

MISSION: vanilla cupcakes, chocolate cupcakes, gluten/dairy free cupcakes. Buttercream frosting and marshmallow frosting. 84 in total.

Holy moley. That's all I'm going to say about these cupcakes. I'm not going to lie - I had a mini breakdown towards the end AND I had to enlist a bit of help from my husband, but I got there in the end.

Tuesday night I made a LOT of buttercream. Half mint, half strawberry. And just for fun, I coloured the strawberry purple. My sister had said that she wanted everything purple and gold!!! Note: boring old food colour did NOT cut it in the colour stakes. It looked foul. Lucky for me, I had some Wilton purple in my decorating bag of tricks, so I used that - you'll see how awesome it came out later...

Yay artificial colour!!

I was going to keep the mint white, but it stubbornly remained yellow (even after a lot of whipping), so I gave up and made it a pale green. Personally, I find it hard to 'taste' the minty-ness of the buttercream unless it's green...you really do eat with your eyes!

I popped it in the fridge to save for Friday (when I had planned to decorate).

So, come Thursday night I started baking. And what a LOT of baking it was!

A late addition to this story would be the fact that at the last minute, I was asked to bake gluten free AND dairy free cupcakes as well as everything else. So, I bought a packet mix earlier in the week. These would be the cupcakes that I would start with. So, off I went! Luckily, the mix was super easy and while the cupcakes were baking, I was able to get started on the vanilla cupcakes.

I had a moment of brilliance/stupidity and decided that I was going to colour the batter purple. Yay purple! Did I mention that I made 4 packs of cake mix at once?

MEGA BATTER!

I must show you the patty pans, because they are awesome. And, to make it even better, I got them at 25% off from Spotlight. Woo!

Flash forward and I finish baking all the vanilla cupcakes. There were a crapload! But they looked so sweet...all purple and golden brown :)

So, now it's on to the chocolate mud cakes, right? I had planned on using two packet mixes and each packet required three eggs. So, I go to the fridge and this is what I saw:

Bup bow!

Yes, that's five eggs. And by now, I'm sure you've done the maths and have worked out that I'm an egg short. I've talked about having a plan B, so this is where the internet comes in handy. 

I've heard and read about egg-less cooking, but haven't tried it. I've seen a lot of pinterest tips fail, though, so I'm quite a skeptic. Anyway, it's about 9.30pm at this point in time, so I'm willing to give anything a try. I consulted about 3 websites and they all suggested banana as a substitute for egg. Luckily, I have pureed banana (thanks, Destructor!), so I pop in a quarter of a cup to make up for the lack of egg, say a few Hail Marys and give it a good whizz.

Baby food - not just for babies anymore!

The cupcakes come out of the oven looking just like they normally do, so I'm feeling a little less worried about the whole banana-instead-of-egg experiment. I would totally eat one at this point, but I need all of them. Looks like the general public will once again be my guinea pigs!

Meanwhile, all my vanilla cupcakes are cool, so I have a really crazy idea - since I'm up and on a roll, why not frost all the strawberry ones?

So, my bowl of buttercream comes out of the fridge and goes into the microwave. I take it out, give it a stir and watch it split. As Ren would say, "You eeeeeeeediot, Stimpy!" Plan B (which I've had to carry out a few times) is to pop it into the fridge. A little while later, it comes out of the fridge all cooled down and I give it a quick whizz - BAM! It's back to normal. Phew! 

So, off I go, frosting like a crazy lady. The heart sprinkles go on next, accompanied by little bit of gold glitter. They are perfect! Hooray! I send a pic to my sister and she too is happy.

Next, I hurry up my chocolate cupcakes (by chucking them in the fridge to cool) and very carefully (because I've learned my lesson!) microwave the mint buttercream. 

10 minutes later, they're done. I did a rose on the top and added gold sprinkles. Yum!

I'm wrecked at this point, so decide that I'll to go bed (after doing the dishes of course!) I also realise that I'm going to have to hit the shops the following morning as I am going to need some eggs for the marshmallow frosting. But that's okay - I'll get to the shops early (while my husband is home to feed Destructor breakfast) and then I'll be ready to frost at 10.30am (during nap time).

So, Friday dawns. I race to the shops and buy 15 eggs and get back in time for my husband to go to work. Destructor and I go to the park, have a play (read: sit on the swing for half an hour) and then it's nap time.

First thing I do is inject 20 or so cupcakes with lemon curd (from a jar at the supermarket). I bought this nifty little doo-dad for $2 on Wednesday - I'm hoping it'll save me even more time. The alternative method is cutting a bit out of each cupcake, spooning in lemon curd, putting the top back on. It takes AGES.

Time saver!

So, I fill up the syringe with lemon curd and off I go. I can't see exactly what's happening with each cupcake, but I assume I'm putting in enough. The syringe is soon empty, so I go to refill. However, what I don't count on is that the plunger in the syringe allows lemon curd so sneak back into the main chamber, so when I pull it out, lemon curd (about 3 tablespoons of the stuff) comes out with it. Mess made, lesson learned. However, I am filling these cupcakes a LOT quicker. Since I don't have x-ray vision, I plan on asking for feedback when people eat them to gauge whether or not there's enough curd.

Cupcakes filled, I start the marshmallow frosting. I'm going to use it on the gluten/dairy free cupcakes as well, so I need to make more than initially anticipated. But that's okay. 

Frosting finished, I go to put it in the piping bag. It's not like it usually is, so I'm a little suspicious. I pipe it out and it looks HORRIBLE. And I'm not just saying that, it looked like white poop. Being the perfectionist that I am, I simply can't let it go. So, I scrape it off and start again.

Round two also looks like a mess. I'm starting to get stressed at this point, as I know my time is very limited. So, off I go to make round three. Guess what? It's also crap. My husband comes home from work at this point in time, only to see his wife both crazy with rage and on the verge of tears. At this point, I've started ranting. I've also thrown the piping bag onto the ground, meringue flying in all directions. Did I mention that I'm also out of eggs?!?! I can't substitute banana this time! I also have no idea what I'm doing wrong, which is what is the most frustrating part of all this. I've made it before, so I know I can do it! Argh!

It is at this point that my husband reminds me why I married him by racing down the street to buy me another dozen eggs. What a gem! Meanwhile, I clean up the mess from my tantrum and hop online to see what I'm doing wrong. From what I can gather, I'm over beating the eggs. Der!

My new eggs arrive and I start separating. Of course, I manage to get the tiniest bit of yolk into my whites, don't I? But I'm determined now, so, I grab a spoon and fish it out (swallowing my tears at the same time). Once my hot whites hit the mixmaster, I grab a teaspoon of Cream of Tartar and add it to the mix (I read online that this can save your meringue from certain doom). And do you know what? It works! I do a mini dance around the kitchen and start frosting. Much to my relief, it's perfect. Smooth, shiny and delicious. 

I decorate the vanilla/lemon curd cupcakes with a LOT of glitter and a love heart on the top. The gluten/dairy free ones get cocoa lightly sprinkled on top (well, that was the plan, except I mucked it up and they ended up COATED in cocoa) and a bit of glitter for good measure.

I stand back, and have to say, I'm pretty pleased.

Chocolate mint

Vanilla strawberry

vanilla, lemon, marshmallow

So, there you have it. One massive order of cupcakes, one minor meltdown and one hell of a ride!

Post script: The chocolate cupcakes tasted fine. No banana flavour at all. The texture was also spot on. Would do the banana thing again if in the same situation.

There was just the right amount of lemon injected into the cupcakes, so my syringe was a success.